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Category: Advice

In Search of Solace

I was hanging with a friend in Manhattan recently. We’ve never seen eye-to-eye politically and I prefer to simply avoid the subject. This was true more than ever last week because I had no idea where she stood on Donald Trump. And frankly, I thought it best that I not know. Yet at the end of our outing, with me about to descend subway steps to head home, somehow we were there. I made a passing comment about not sleeping well with Trump in the White House and my friend noted that half the country was sleeping very well and didn’t I get some solace from that? That’s an unequivocal no. Solace? What? Solace? This has been working on me all week. I am not getting solace from white supremacists sleeping better. Or gun-toting fools who think the government is out to get them. I get no solace from well-rested “Christians” who want to control whether or not a woman can decide for herself to have a baby, but not give a crap what happens once that child is here and needs real health care. Solace is not my go-to when I think of all the self-loathing women who are immune to the actions and comments of a pussy-grabbing predator and felt it was OK to impose him on the rest of us. Glad they’re happily snoozing? No. Solace?...

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Are Gratuitous Potshots Considered Kind?

In a recent article on The Huffington Post called “How to Get Flat Abs, Have Amazing Sex and Rule the World in 8 Easy Steps,” Kate Bartolotta writes compellingly under this provocative headline about what’s important in life. It’s a good read. Among my favorites – ‘let people in’ and ‘practice gratitude.’ But the writer (or maybe more like the keen-eyed editor) who lives within me stopped short on one line in the second step, which encourages us to ‘Be happy now.’ “Not because of some shiny happy Oprah crap,” Bartolotta writes.   My Unfettered Advice: Your work is...

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Here’s What Your Readers Really Need, Jeff

No one could argue that Jeff Bezos has it going on when it comes to business sense and enormous vision. According to a recent article in The Washington Post – which he is about to own – he built Amazon.com from “a start-up in 1995 to an Internet colossus with $61 billion in sales last year.” It’s only logical that Bezos wants to apply what he’s learned to this new venture in the media landscape. “We’ve had three big ideas at Amazon that we’ve stuck with for 18 years, and they’re the reason we’re successful: Put the customer first....

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People Pleasing, an Impossible Task …

Dear unfettered — I used to sell insurance and stopped due to kids, life, etc. I was well loved at the place I worked because I gave my customers a lot of extra time and explained in detail what they were getting. I have recently started up again on my own and many of the old clients, who I am friends with (small town), wanted to switch to me rather than the old company. I did not solicit. They just like the way I work and feel more comfortable with me. A friend at the old firm who is...

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Bill, Maybe Consider Possibilianism?

Proof of Heaven by Eben Alexander is No. 1 on The New York Times Best Sellers list as I write this and is in its 37th week on the list overall. This fact irks Bill Maher, who on his recent Real Time show lumped in Dr. Alexander, a neurosurgeon who had a near-death experience, with a string of politicians who have made headlines for saying factually incorrect things in the political arena. Maher used the term “smart-stupid” to characterize people who are anti-intellectual with advanced degrees (i.e., Ted Cruz, Ron Paul, Phil Gingrey) and called it a phenomenon. He...

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